It's no secret that Alzheimer's can be an unpredictable, twisting and turning ride for caregivers. Weeks - even months - of stable behavior patterns can be replaced in an instant by different sleeping, eating, and social patterns. This experience of dramatic change is a challenging lesson in adaptability and acceptance.
For months, my mother's routine had been compatible with the functioning of our home. She awoke from a good night's sleep at 7:30am, was freshly clean and dressed with a caregiver's help by 8:00am, and finished breakfast, ready for a morning walk about 9:30am.
The rest of us in the house drew false confidence from this stability. We made sure that the space Mama needed for her care was free and clear during certain times. We depended on "normal" nighttime and naptime sleep patterns - for ourselves and for her. Everyone seemed to be mentally and physically healthy for an extended time.
Then, there was an unpredicted change - no more sleeping through the night, meals off schedule, and only the briefest of naps in the afternoon. My first response was a sense of betrayal. I found myself thinking "I did everything I was supposed to do. This wasn't supposed to happen. Things were going so well!"
I've realized, after years of Alzheimer's care giving, that prolonged calm periods of routine schedules are unusual blessings. Acceptance of his reality comes with difficulty.
Enjoy established routines however long they last and be prepared for change. Accepting the credo, "Expect the unexpected", softens the shock of having to create yet another workable plan.
