The early Alzheimer's behavior that agitated me the most was Mama's repetitive questions. Every morning, she would ask the same ones over and over. If I came within earshot, I would hear, "Have I had my blood pressure medicine?" "Is somebody here with me today?" "Have I had breakfast?" I would answer every question, helping her get her bearings for the day. Immediately, the information was lost to her , and the questions would start again. I would respond until irritation and impatience overcame me. Mama couldn't retain the answers, no matter how many times they were repeated. After months of this frustrating routine, I sadly began to ignore the questions, post written notes all over her room, and reduce our contact.
One morning, I awoke with an inspiration - "I'll find a simple recorder that Mama can operate, and I will record the information that she seeks every day. She can play the messages as often as she likes." I tried an old recorder I had used at work. It was too complicated. Mama would mistakenly erase recordings or turn off the volume. I looked in toy stores and searched the web. There were no recorders that were simple enough for my purpose.
This is how I became a part-time inventor, working with generous designers and manufacturers who helped me produce The Kind Reminder™. It is a simplified recorder worn as a pendant. Just press the one big, visible button to hear a comforting message in a familiar voice. Learn about The Kind Reminder™ here, and see the You Tube video.
Anxiety about her safety and whereabouts seemed to be at the root of Mama's repetitive questions. She had a recurring impulse "to get things straight", as she put it. The Kind Reminder™ provided reassuring information on demand and created a buffer between our emotional selves. When she would start with the questions, I could choose to refer her to my recording. She seemed to take pride in getting the answers by herself. Sometimes the message that calmed her was as simple as "I love you Mom".
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