A medical appointment for my mother can be tense. The doctor and staff are tightly scheduled. My emotional and physical systems are in high gear. I am watching out for Mama, who is frail and tired. I am trying to listen carefully, remember the questions I want answered, and stay calm.
There is only a brief time to exchange information. What would they like to know about her? What do I need from them? The stakes seem high - Is blood pressure trending toward a risky level? Is more walking good or will it further injure the stress fracture? I need to understand what is happening.
How can these appointments become more relaxed and generate more satisfying results? Here are a few suggestions:
1. Make a list of specific questions in advance - e.g., "Can you give me a list of danger signs for someone with this heart condition." "How does her heart medication impact her blood pressure?" "What can we do to treat her swollen ankles?"
2. Ask up front how much time is available for the appointment.
3. Speak up! Clarify your goals at the beginning - e.g., "I am here because I want to work with you to provide Mama excellent medical care. I want to understand her condition, follow your instructions, and rely on you for advice."
4. Ask for an overview of how their practice works - e.g., "Help me understand how your practice is organized. We have met with the doctor once, now we're meeting with the nurse practitioner. Can we expect to see the doctor again? Who should I ask for, if I have a concern?
5. Make notes about what they promise to do for you - e.g., give you a records release form to sign before you leave, request the hospital discharge summary for their files, call in prescription refills to your pharmacy. Follow up, if they don't.
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